Cards Against Humanity!


– How many have played the game
Cards Against Humanity? Do you know the game?
[cheers and applause] Popular game. We’re gonna try it right now
with Derek and Julianne and Nicole. And so here– I pick the category. And you’re gonna
pick the card. And then I’ll turn my back
and I’ll figure out who picks the best,
funniest card. You see if you’re gonna match
what I’m gonna say, okay? – Yeah. – All right,
so the first one is… “What never fails
to liven up the party?” I will turn around
and not look. – Okay. Okay.
– Okay? – We’re done, yeah.
– All right. Uh…
Oh, then I turn them over. I see, I see. But you probably
mixed them up so that you’re not
in order like that. – Yeah. – “Extremely tight pants.” “My humps.” “The miracle
of childbirth.” [laughter] You know what?
They’re all good. But I’m gonna go with
“The miracle of childbirth.” – Yeah!
[cheers and applause] – I think you said
tight pants. – I did actually.
– Yeah? – And I know about
your humps ’cause we’ve danced
together at a party. – Yeah. – All right.
So do I move these? All right,
let’s see the next one. “I drink to forget…” – Oh, shoot.
Okay. Okay. Ready? – Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait. – Okay.
– Yeah. – “I drink to forget…” “Your weird brother.” “Daddy issues.” “Lumberjack fantasies.” I’m gonna have to go
with “lumberjack fantasies.” – I love it.
– Oh. I’m gonna say “your weird
brother” was you. – No, “daddy issues”
was mine. – That was me.
They’re the same. – Yeah, yeah. – All right,
it kinda is the same. All right,
let’s see the next one. “A romantic candlelit dinner
would be incomplete without…” – All right.
– Okay? – Yeah.
– All right. Without “a can of whoop-ass.” Without “puberty.” – [laughing]
Without puberty. – “Full frontal nudity.” [cheers and applause] – Agreed. – Hmm. It’s kinda down
to these two right here. Uh, I’m gonna say
“Full frontal nudity.” [cheers and applause] – Good choice. Wildly inappropriate.
– All right. You win.
Look what you won. You win, Julianne.
– I win? Whoo-hoo!
– Yeah, a blender. – Oh, I have, like, five. At Derek’s house.
– Yeah. – Yeah, a blender.
– Yay!

Author Since: Mar 11, 2019

  1. I just remember wildcat, mini, basically and the whole group playing this 😂😂😂
    I drink to forget the deformed

    My people knkw what im talking about

  2. My best combo ever was:
    “A snapping turtle biting off the tip of my penis” + “a sea of troubles” = “jerking off in a pool of children’s tears”

  3. Nicole Richie looks beautiful with short hair wow! I just saw a video of her recently filmed and I think she should totally chop her hair again it’s gorgeous! Beautiful either way though

  4. This would have went alot darker if it weren't for the TV barrier, watch YouTuber style CAH to see some really edgy stuff

  5. Such a great use of valuable time that you will never retrieve !!! The whole world heading for the cliff.

  6. >Casual YouTube user complains about the game of Cards being played on Ellen — a syndicated over-the-air show — is too clean.
    >Casual YouTube user lacks any and all knowledge of Broadcast Standards & Practices.
    >Casual YouTube user gets chewed out viciously and is presented the entirety of even the Wikipedia article on Broadcast Standards & Practices.
    >Casual YouTube user laughs and asks if he is going to cry.
    >Casual YouTube user swallows reality.

    –The majority of you lot on here.

  7. tell me if anyone gets this reference
    JUST A SMALL TOWN GIRL
    an autistic LIIIIITTLE GIIIIRL
    (hint:panda)

  8. ONE TIME I PLAYED THIS WITH MY FRIENDS AND THE QUESTION WAS SOMETHING LIKE "why didnt they let me put ___ inside of_____." AND I SAID "why wouldn't they let me put a 7.99 all you can eat shrimp buffet inside of auswitchz" WE LAUGHED FOR WEEKS

  9. Way to clean! I knew the yanks on tv would pick the most sensitive opinions! The darker the better! That’s how you win!

  10. I don't get this game. What is the point of Ellen choosing a card? Is that the "correct" answer? Maybe I've been watching too much Family Feud

  11. This game is extremely rude nd has causes many arguments nd disagreements which have led to many physical fights nd injuries

  12. Love this game! It's so much fun to play and really is hilarious… received it as a birthday gift. 🙂 Highly recommend if you're a horrible person. HAHA

  13. I play the “Darkest Dungeon” version… a party usually has a Vampire, A mutant crocodile, or giant f***ing mosquitoes, a romantic date would be incomplete without A pelagic fish monster, a hideous shape shifter, or a half human insectoid who drinks corrupted blood, I drink to forget The cyclopian ruins, the unholy undead, or the voices echoing from pig like demons, so on.

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